Things I Fear.

Wow how interesting: this challenge comes just one day after a post on Confession. I confessed to afraid. Generally, a Confession is an admission of some ugly thing that one has done. I don’t have any of those stories to tell. I do, however, have this one:

There was a reason why I felt like I should confess to being afraid but even more importantly there's a reason why I don't mind writing about my fears.

I am afraid

I fear many things and circumstance and it's because of what I've seen. The things I've seen up-close-and-personal in my life have frightened me beyond expression. These things have always been there and I've never seen any relief from these things.

“What Things,” you ask?

I was afraid as a child.

I was always afraid of being hit. [Yes, we got whippings.] I have always been afraid of physical violence. I'm even more afraid of physical violence today because I don't have any protection. As a child, I had parents. Later, I had only my mother. After becoming an adult, I suppose I did have the police but...

I have always been afraid of the police.

Why was I afraid of the police?

I was afraid of the police because they could kill me just as easily as they can help me. Not only that, I have always heard stories about the police doing horrible things to people to women particularly black women.

I live in this world in black skin, in a female body, alone. I don't have a spouse. I don't have male children; I don't have any children.

I don't live in a protected environment or a gated community.

I live my life and I move and I come and go and I'm always thinking about this. It is a really terrible way to live.

This is the dual consciousness that W.E.B. DuBois talked about.

I know that I am American but I also know that I am black.

To me, that means the whole world could easily make war against me and no one would stop it; no one could help me. That's a horrible fact to live with.

What follows is a very hard story to tell, but I will tell it anyway. It likely won’t read well but I seem to have some difficulty making it flow any better and I wanted it posted tonight!

No Caption Necessary...

And then last year, 2015, the 3rd of July the day before independence day the Klan had a rally in South Carolina to protest removing the flag and I start to think about what it would be like if the clan had a rally right here in town where I live. What would it be like if I looked out the window later on tonight and I thought the Klan marching up the street from the church at the top of the hill? I had an absolute full-blown panic attack I couldn't even think the only thing I could think was what if what if they decided to come in at a courthouse as they move through the neighborhood. And then what if you wanted that one person came to the front door started breaking and other person came to the back door or through the window it wouldn't take very much for anybody to get into the house where I live and I was thinking about that and I had an absolute panic attack because I don't have anyone to protect myself.

I have no way to protect myself.

Even if I had a way to protect myself, I would have to live with the fact that I killed somebody or hurt somebody. I would also live with a very good possibility that I'd be punished I am NOT inmate material.

So I paced back in forth in the house. I could feel my body changing. I started to feel a different energy surge through my body that I've never felt before.

I tried to lie down but that didn't work.

I then had an overwhelming desire to eat something sweet. I had nothing sweet to eat in the house [sweeter than Honey] and I didn't have any thoughts of leaving the house to get something. So I repeated to myself, ‘you have to calm down’.

Finally I said to myself. ‘Sandra they can only kill you one time,’ then I started to relax.

But that didn't do anything about the Fears that I continued to live with.

This was my clearest and truest experience of how emotions affect appetite. I was overwhelmed with the desire for something sweet!

I eventually calmed myself.

And then it made me so angry to think about how it happened, to know that every 6 months [sometimes less] the white people--through the white police--in a different part of the country take their turn in just incidentally killing black people.

But just the very idea that a white boy could be welcomed into an African-American church and then turn right around and kill the very people who welcomed to him and then the authorities declare that he was insane. Really!?

That's the only reason he would do it? Then he gets off.

Well when the police officer in full charge of his faculties, things does it he's not declared insane. He just simply gets sent home with a warning not to do it again. Before long, he's back at working. His children don't have to live without their father; his siblings without their brother; his parents without their child.

I also live with the fear of oppression. I live with a fear of poverty. I live with the fear of all illness. I don't have a really have a few of old age--that's one of the things that a lot of people talk about. I don't fear old age and infirmity.

If this post had a CTA, it would be to not perpetrate fear upon people because you have some authority over them; do not deny that you use fear to control others who are different from you. Stop making excuses when you know your people have committed heinous acts of terror and hate and meanness against others. Don’t pretend to be something you are not! Because, if you take a few moments and think honestly, you’ll probably find you are as afraid as I am. So please, don’t bother suggesting ways that I can cope. I’m in the 64^th year of doing just that. But...

Someone should want something better!

Sharing My Collection

SandraTeresa Davenport | The Health Reverend

LiveWellToday/DrinkTeaAlways!

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Campus Carry

Night Time in My Home Town

I am TheHealthReverend. It is my duty, my calling, my obligation, to speak out when the health is threatened, compromised, at-risk in any way. It is my further obligation to always trouble the comforted amongst us, to let us know that NO ONE is safe/healthy until we all are! To that end, I am speaking on a coupla topics that cause me great heartache, but indeed, I speak!

Wow. Just today on my blogtalkradio show, I discussed the killing of small girls in a church in Birmingham, Alabama. What I best recall about that day is how I wondered, in complete bewilderment, i) why someone would BOMB A CHURCH, ii) why grown white men would hurt little girls like me and iii) why, in the name of Jesus, didn’t anyone care? No one was embarrassed. No authorities stepped up. No one was punished. 

Then I wondered why white people hated us so much. I never was one for asking, so I just wondered. I wondered why white christians, preachers, teachers, even parents, didn’t seem to care about us. It’s just too much to think, that all these same people are staying home, locking doors and loading weapons. 

I wonder why it is that every American and every Christian must be better than someone and has the absolute right to hate someone. And never feel bad about it. I heard a white woman, sitting behind me on a plane, say ‘I hate southerners’. She said it more than once and with great emphasis. I approached her as we were de-planing. She was kind, she said, ‘I don’t hate you.’ Should I have felt good? Relieved? Special? Her husband is a minister and she is a Christian but she felt no shame at her statement. Imagine that.

I’d be willing to bet that she owns at least one weapon.

I am a certified law enforcement officer, trained and qualified in the use of handguns and shotguns. The instruction is ‘never shoot until you are sure of your target and what’s behind it’ and ‘look through the sights; not at the target.’ I must wonder if all those Texans have had adequate training? I wonder how they carry their weapons so that they can make a quick and accurate draw. 

Even more importantly, I still wonder if any of them are embarrassed afterwards? Or just dog-gone made, cause they missed! Wow. It’s a scary situation, a very bad, very scary situation. 

I refuse to wonder what it will be like in another 20 years after every able-bodied racist is able to kill whomever they like. They will soon outstrip the big-city police officers.

The late, great Dr. Howard Thurman stated that patriotism is a good excuse for national hatred. The time of true national hatred must be at hand, and it’s full, active, often, expression.

Heaven, Help Us All!

 SandraTeresa Davenport

TheHealth Reverend

LiveWellToday/DrinkTeaAlways!

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Martin & Malcolm & America | A Dream or a Nightmare

This is the title of a book by James H. Cone. I enjoyed reading it the first time and I enjoyed reading it the second time [last month].

This book was a gift to me from a friend I met at seminary. I attended the same seminary that Dr. King did, and Dr Cone taught at that seminary. He left before I got there. Which seminary was that? The ITC [Interdenominational Theological Center]. We are The ITC because every other seminary trains preachers in its own denomination. [At least, they once did.] We are the home of every African-American denomination plus Catholic and At-Large contingents as well.

When I enrolled, I encountered some difficulties with matriculation. Meaning: I found that I had no patience for the process of being taught by preachers to think like them. I had no intention of doing that [thinking like them] and tried to relieve myself of the Baptist label. It didn't happen: At-large was much more expensive and of course, Catholic was out.

But, I digress.

When I started this blog, I indicated that I would have a standing feature of a book review. I am returning to that function by way of the above-titled book. I was going to say what I loved about it: Well, other than the obvious, it thrills me to hear Malcolm's opinions and insight into White American Christianity presented so skillfully. He didn't know anything that Dr. King didn't; he simply didn't present with such soft eloquence. In any case, I'll return with a review here shortly.

In the meantime, remember that Tea--AllThingsTea--is the foundation of the teachings of LivingWellMinistries. So, please expect an entry on the topic at every opportunity. More importantly, please expect the AllThingsTea tab on this blog to come alive shortly.

I have just begun to enjoy Fahari Ya Kenya Tea. It is a strong, vital Black Tea with Ginger added. Potent and full bodied, it is composed of Fannings. As I am sure you recall from January posts, Fannings are the tiny little pieces of Tea left on the table of the drying/fanning room. 

That's my post for tonite. Verryyy sleepy.

LiveWellToday/DrinkTeaAlways!

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African-American History: Love, Kindness and Heart Health

I am an African-American, Southern born-and-bred, Seminary-educated, ordained minister, raised and indoctrinated in the Southern Baptist Tradition. I believed for many years that sickness is somehow related to sin and punishment. I have independent study, experience and research into the various interpretations of sickness. I have extensive study and practice in the field of alternative health and wellness, including nutrition as disease prevention. Finally, I have studied extensively the relationship between belief and behavior. This post is my Valentine’s Day gift to you. I trust you will find this information enlightening, if not liberating. Liberation, as you know, is the ultimate goal of all learning.

NOTE: According to John Mbiti, in the African tradition of time, as long as the name of a departed is called, the departed remains with us. I, therefore, dedicate today’s post to the life and memory of my Fourth Sister, Tanya Renita Davenport. She departed this plane so very long ago, entirely too soon. Today is her birthday, Valentine’s Day!

Tea Party for My Sister!

Jane Roberts, in The Way Toward Health, discusses “The Broken-Hearted, the Heartless and Medical Technology,” making the following quote regarding heart disease:

“With many people having such difficulties, the addition of love in the environment may work far better than any heart operation. In other words, ‘a love transplant’ in the environment may work far better overall than a heart-transplant operation, or a bypass, or whatever; in such ways the heart is allowed to heal itself.” (p. 154).

Discussing the effect of beliefs upon behavior, Roberts states that people who are exercising strenuously and vigorously do so not because they seek good health; but because they fear illness and because they dislike their own bodies. (emphasis added). She speaks of the various levels of beliefs with which a person lives. For example, a person’s reasons for exercising are more important than the exercises that are performed (p. 157). Roberts also states that one’s ideas about one’s health are more important than steps that one might take to improve it.

Roberts states that there are some very basic religious beliefs which teach that illness and disease are God’s punishment (p. 163); however, she does suggest that many times illness and disease can be catalysts to life-style changes which a person otherwise might not have made, without the illness. She says that feelings of being ...

“ ... coldhearted, or heartless, ... will have a significant effect upon that physical organ; ... “She states that many people who have heart trouble have no ‘heart’ for life (p. 164).

Roberts talks not only of physical health, but it also provides sheds some light on the wholeness of the entire entity, “(W)e are not speaking of physical health alone, but of mental, spiritual, and emotional health as well. You are not healthy, for example, no matter how robust your physical condition, if your relationships are unhealthy, unsatisfying, frustrating, or hard to achieve (p. 233).”

An American Health Dilemma Volume One - A Medical History of African- Americans and the Problem of Race: Beginnings to 1900 (2000), by W. Michael Byrd and Linda A. Clayton discusses the historical medical/health experience of the African-American from pre-historic to present times. This source lays out the interactions not only between Africans and Europeans but also Africans and Arabs. The writers use data of various sorts to simply outline the ‘dilemma’ of African-American health and disease. One chart outlines the social causes of disease among the colonial slaves, citing among the reasons, the grief of enslavement. In a discussion of black health in the period 1731 through 1812, Byrd and Clayton report that, “In the south, blacks were sometimes permitted to practice folk and herbal medicine on fellow slaves ... (p. 241).” This source moves forward through the nuances of history, education and culture, with the notion of ‘scientific racism’ being the common thread. While discussing the education of Martin Delaney and Dr. John Sweat Rock, the first African-American dentist, they point out that at every hand, one after another obstacle to advancement was constructed (p. 308-310). The sum of these discussions is to point out that today’s health crisis among African Americans has its genesis in the three-way slave trade, hit its stride in the pre-Civil War through Emancipation Periods and today, continues unabated, even to the extent that present-day white physicians expect from and in some cases, unconsciously assign, poor health to African Americans (emphasis added) (p. 216).

My calling to ministry was to ‘teach and preach’. I have learned entirely too much to keep it to myself. If you find this information ‘off-putting’ in any way, I have done my job. The least that a teacher can do is cause the student to think differently. Please consider these things—think on these things—as you move forward through the year. You may be called upon to aid someone who has an ailing heart. The ailing heart may be healed just through love and kindness.
While we speak of heart health, I have added in the video below, just to give some extra edge, in case you need something to think about while you're resting. 

God is with us! Ashe!

SandraTeresa Davenport

The Health Reverend

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What Does African-American History Mean to You?

Study! and show thyself approved!

Generally, when someone asks a question in this fashion, it means they want to tell you something instead of listen to you tell them.

For example, during the President’s first campaign, a white woman said to me, ‘You’re not going to vote for Obama, are you?’ Well, as it happens, my brain can only answer or ask a question; not both at the same time. I didn’t remember to ask her who else she thought I’d vote for. I did, however, ask what she thought she had in common with Mitt Romney. I don’t recall her answer.

But, I digress.

But really, Yawl, I’d love to know what African-American history means to White Americans. I once asked this question of every one of my White American email contacts. That came to about 30 people. I got a total of two responses. They both prattled along about not being responsible for things that happened long ago and one said something about taking her cares to the cross and letting Jesus work it all out. Oh my. What does that mean?

I once mentioned feminism and women’s rights with the president of my high school senior class. He joked that it was the same as Black History to White Americans. He thought it was funny and took offense when I didn’t.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t take any offense at all when White Americans don’t care about African-American history. I am accustomed to people who are incarcerated inside their own ignorance. My conclusion is this: a person may [is free to] believe [embrace unsubstantiated information as true] anything until they know. Knowledge and belief are two entirely different brain/intellectual functions.

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”Buddha quotes (Hindu Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism, 563-483 B.C.)

To the extent that belief guides behavior, people are safe in their behaviors a long as they have a belief that will defend it. [I.e., husband who believe they have the right to control their wives, even if it includes physical brutality.] So, as long as one group of people believes that they  are superior to another, they are safe in their behaviors. Remember this:

New occasions teach new duties, time makes ancient good uncouth.

So, as long as no one studies African-American history but African-Americans, White Americans are safe in their belief of racial superior. The big trouble is, no one makes any progress.

I’ll be writing this topic all month. March is Women’s History Month, so I shouldn’t have to tell you my topic.

Here’s an assignment for you: If you really don’t, haven’t and couldn’t give a dam less about African-American history, consider this: African-American history is the missing pages of American history. Take a chance: study it. That way, you won’t have to be obnoxious when you don’t have an intelligent answer and most all, you will know the truth and be set free from your ignorance, your arrogance and may even avoid some really bad, un-Christian behaviors.

Ok, so that’s it for now. Don’t forget to drink your Tea, because it is your friend. For the sake of African-American History Month, I suggest African Red Bush [aka Rooibos]. You will surely be glad you did.

This is also National Heart Health Month. I will be talking with you about how the various emotions [fear, dread, loss, depression] and environmental factors [racism, poverty, un/underemployment] affect the life chances and life results of all Americans. It’s part of my job, you know, I am The Health Reverend!

Upcoming Later this Month:

Book Reviews:

Martin and Malcolm and America  James Cone

An African Prayer Book – Desmond Tutu

Seeds of Change: Five plants that transformed mankind  - Henry Hobhouse

Jesus and The Disinherited – Howard Thurman

Further Posts:
‘I Hate Southerners – Recap of a Conversation overheard on a Plane coming home from Phoenix’

LivewellToday/DrinkTea!

SandraTeresa Davenport

The Health Reverend

TheHealthReverendSpeaks! on BlogTalkRadio

Listen Live Local Saturday @ 7:00 p.m.

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For The Record...

64 Years Ago, This Was a Hospital
My BirthPlace

When I first heard of the Oregon stand-off, I just felt astonished. Then, after I thought about it, I felt disgust. Then a bit later, it was just comical. The over-reaching feeling that I have is: dam.

Really? This is what government does to defend itself, against enemies, both foreign and domestic? Wow.

Is the total count of men inside the armory equal to the number of black male CITIZENS murdered by white police officers this year, alone?

Is this the way government has decided to deal with its white male OUTLAWS these days?

Am I the only one who wonders this? What will it take for white people to punish white people? We already know it’s not when they kill us, steal from us, fire us, and whatever else. But a takeover of government property? Really?

And now, which of the presidential candidates will use this as a great new platform? Is this a matter of gun control? I think not.

Imagine this guy comparing himself to Rosa Parks, of all people.

Where Is It?

I just can’t get over the fact this guy and his followers are still alive, but they are. Really?

Does anyone remember when the city of Philadelphia [or, it might’ve been Pittsburgh] set fire to an entire city block, in search of one lone black militant? Somehow or other, they just don’t want these guys.

Wow.

Ok, now for the record, as I conclude my rambling: I give up! I give up on government. The voting process is a complete, thigh-slapping joke. I was about to develop some faith in process, but this is ridiculous. I can only shake my head.

This is what the ‘greatest county on earth’ wants to the world to know about it: We learn terrorism right here at home...What. A. Shame...

Thank you for your time in reading this post. Let me know if you can help me understand it all.

Until later livewelltoday/DrinkTea! 

Sincerely,

SandraTeresa Davenport

TheHealthReverend

 BTW my photos have nothing to do with my post. I just put them to prove that I, too, am an American! 

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I. Don't. GetIt!

Seriously, I don't get it.
 Sometimes I say I do; but honestly, I don't get racial hatred. 

I have had to drink several pots of green tea and take several long, fast walks in the hot summer sun to be able to pen these words. Last night, in bed, I thought about it and I got dizzy and nauseous.

So, here's what I don't get:

why white people hate black people so much that they must randomly kill a few of us now and then. I don't get why the white police need to gang up on a black unarmed/unhealthy/hooded black male once in a while and kill him.

I don't get why white people are not embarrassed by this behavior. I know a good 500 white people, in all. Nary a one has ever called, written, emailed or texted me to express condolence, sorrow, sadness, at either of such occurrences. But ...

White Americans hold themselves out to anyone who listens as being the very paragon of righteousness and virtue. But, again, Nary A One raises a voice when such things as a 'racial hatred' crime is committed. The police even took the time to put the shooter in a bullet-proof vest. Wow. What were the other people in the crowd doing while they waited??? Just wondering.

I don't get it why there is never a hue and cry from white pastors, 'conscious' white police officers, teachers, store keepers, ALL. Why? I don't get why nobody cares about what happens to us. I don't get it that all the white people who are friends with, married to, bonded with, supervised by and surely, indebted to at least one black person don't raise their voices!

I just don't get it.

And to make bad matters worse, I don't get why they all think they can think for us. That is one of my favorite things: Paternalism. We are not capable of our own thinking/acting/speaking so they must do it for us.

Case in Point: I don't care about the Confederate Flag. Got it! It is a symbol of something that means a great deal to a great many white americans [hell, for all I know, black, too]. Let them hang on to their illusions for as long as they can. The very idea that Wal-Mart would 'pull' confederate items is a insult to my own intelligence. I'd appreciate it a whole more if Wal-Mart stopped treating their employees like chattel property and 'allowed', at least encouraged, unions, and a $15 minimum wage. The most successful retailer in history could surely pull this off. But no. Instead, they do what they think they can to avoid 'offending' us and pull confederate stuff. Really.

But, this is where it gets really good: The white people are astonished to hear the prez use their favorite racial expletive. Imagine that. We'd never have heard the term if white people hadn't assigned it to us. So he uses it and they're astonished. I guess they're afraid he's about to forget all his training and 'become' one. Hell, in their minds, he was never anything else.

These white people: I just really don't get....

Ok, sure. These photos have nothing to do with what I just wrote. But if you have any kindness in your soul at all, u should surely be feeling the heaviness of these days. Green tea is a great palliative for such 'sinking'.


THIS IS NOT ALL THAT I HAVE TO SAY!!!

God be with us.

Sincerely, Sandra Teresa Davenport
thehealthreverend

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